what does the bible say about holding grudges

The Bible consistently teaches that holding grudges is wrong and that believers are called to forgive, love, and leave justice in God’s hands. Grudges are pictured as a form of ongoing bitterness that harms both the relationship and the person who is holding onto the hurt.

Quick Scoop

• The Bible forbids holding grudges and commands love instead.
• Forgiveness is tied directly to experiencing God’s forgiveness.
• Letting go of grudges is both a spiritual act of obedience and a path to inner peace.

Key Bible Teachings

• Leviticus 19:18 explicitly says not to “seek revenge or bear a grudge” but to “love your neighbor as yourself,” connecting grudges with disobedience and love with obedience.

• Jesus teaches that forgiving others is a condition for receiving God’s forgiveness, such as in Matthew 6:14–15, which warns that refusing to forgive blocks our own forgiveness.

Grudges vs. Forgiveness

• Grudges are associated with bitterness, anger, and a desire for payback, which the New Testament says to “get rid of” in favor of kindness and compassion.

• Forgiveness is presented not as saying the wrong was “okay,” but as choosing to release the debt and entrust justice to God, who says, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.”

Examples and Stories

• Joseph, betrayed by his brothers, refuses to hold a grudge and instead reassures them, seeing God’s greater purpose in their evil, which becomes a classic biblical model of forgiveness.

• David, wronged by King Saul, refuses to take revenge when he has the chance, choosing to let the Lord judge between them rather than nursing resentment.

Why Letting Go Matters

• Christian writers note that grudges often lead to “anguished bitterness, obsession, and heartache,” hurting the one who clings to them more than anyone else.

• Many modern biblical reflections emphasize that choosing forgiveness—sometimes repeatedly—is a path toward emotional healing, restored relationships where possible, and deeper trust in God’s justice and care.